Facing Fear.

Today I scheduled surgery for treatment of a precancerous condition. My doctor said that there's a high likelihood that this will prevent any cancer from developing, but she also said that she can't say that it isn't cancer already until after the surgery. I could panic. I haven't yet. I may still be in shock. My biopsy was a week ago. Today I got the results. Two and a half weeks from now I go into surgery. That's not a lot of time to process. I have however made the decision to adopt a macrobiotic healing diet and lifestyle. This blog is me giving myself a forum to share my experience, and hopefully connect with others who have faced similar challenges.
After my appointment this morning, I indulged in some retail therapy. I bought myself a stainless steel pressure cooker for grains and such, and a spiffy new chef's knife to motivate me to cook for myself. I packed away all the cookbooks that don't fit the healing phase of macrobiotic cooking, and gave my current tomes pride of place. Christina Pirello's Cooking the Whole Foods Way and The Hip Chicks Guide to Macrobiotics. I also kept out Katz's Wild Fermentation and Braunstein's Sprout Garden. From the Library I ordered two of Mishio Kushi's books on macrobiotic healing diets, and The Kind Diet by Alicia Silverstone, which has a section on macro life.
Now I'm sitting here staring at a computer screen wondering why I'm not asleep... as I take a sip of what will be my last latte for quite awhile. I suspect that this will be the hardest of my life habits to give up. I have a weakness for soy latte's.